A Day in the Life

Years ago, when Terry held her Congressional Guide Service appointment, and I parked our car in the Senate parking lot to wait, tourists took my picture and asked which state I represented. I had some explaining to do. Today it was time to do some more explaining when a group of Terry's students came to her office to meet her for the first time and asked me, "Dr. Fulbright?"

Well, classes started and I'm enjoying the campus while Terry teaches. As we pulled up, the Vice Dean grabbed Terry and off they went to the welcome reception. My wife described it as the deans in a receiving line and as the faculty made their way through, the men kissed the men, the women kissed the women, and those who were religious smiled warmly with their right hands over their hearts. Typically thoughtful, she brought me pastries, which were delicious. As we sat in Terry's office the students came by to welcome each professor individually, with more coffee and delicious Jordanian dates. As if that wasn't enough, a faculty member stopped by to escort Terry up to the third reception of the day and again I was the lucky beneficiary of... coffee and pastries. Terry taught her first class and said she was touched by "the strength of the bright and shiny female faces peeking out from behind layers of fabric."

Attending university here is a privilege for which much is sacrificed and students don't take it for granted. Speaking of sacrifice, you all know Terry and I constantly hold hands. Not anymore. At least not here. Public displays of affection between men and women are culturally unacceptable (although we saw hand-holding once). On the other hand, men greet men with kisses on the cheek, as women do with women, and men walk around holding hands with other men, as do women with women. We really stand out here anyway (men I've never met take one look and say hello to me in English) so we are careful not to offend and will save our hand-holding walks for another time and place. I estimate 80% of the women in our upscale "Western" neighborhood cover their heads (but not their faces - maybe 5% do). This is a sure sign of conservative religious practice. There are many Saudis here so it isn't unusual to see groups of women in black abayas (their faces covered by a niqaab) shopping in the most expensive stores, presumably to buy clothing to wear at home (cultural note: we take escalators, not elevators, because of their extreme discomfort when in proximity to unrelated men). Saudi men wear white flowing robes and headdresses and, to our surprise, eyeliner. Wearing shorts in public is like walking around in underwear. Other than a (very) few tourists, it isn't done.

Anyway, on the way home from the university our driver asked if we'd mind if he picked up one of his regulars. Of course we agreed. She was an Iraqi refugee who spoke impeccable English and works for the United Nations. She was quick to offer us the ubiquitous snack of raw dates (delicious, yellow, and crunchy - my in-laws ate them here in Amman years ago). She amiably discussed life in Iraq and the museum antiquities being held, until peace reigns, in countries such as the USA. She bonded with Terry and we were sorry to say good-bye. We then went to eat dinner at a Jordanian restaurant. We had shawarma (lamb roasted on huge revolving skewers) and it was delicious. What we didn't expect to see on the menu were lamb testicles (Pass!). And that was our day: Hugs, kisses, coffee, pastries, fresh plump dates, crunchy yellow dates, interesting people, and great food (but no lamb testicles).

Eid Mubarak!

Anyone who knows my wife knows she has real presence and is extremely smart. Two qualities of hers I most appreciate, however, are her kindness and generosity. She became a nurse to serve and serve she does - whether it's in the jungles of Vietnam, a hospital, teaching in universities, or the many colleagues and students and Jordanian locals she helps - never taking credit, never taking a penny. Today I had the unique experience of wishing a huge extended family "Eid Mubarak" ("Happy Holiday") thanks to my wife's generosity. The family she helped insisted she (and by extension, me) become a part of their family for this important feast day. I can't believe this incredible adventure we're on. Wednesday was the first day of the four day holiday in Islam commemorating God's test of Abraham's devotion. After God ordered Abraham to kill his only son as proof of sincerity, and Abraham didn't hesitate, an angel stepped in to stop the son's slaughter and told Abraham to slaughter a lamb instead (Genesis 22:2).

Prior to our arrival, the men of the family went to morning prayers, then stopped by a large outdoor gathering of sheep herded into the city by Bedouin. The patriarch did the honors, selecting the perfect sheep, which was then slaughtered according to Halal laws, which engender a merciful death for food animals that occurs as swiftly (and thus painlessly) as possible. The sheep was skinned, cleaned, and quartered, with a portion given to the poor, all to commemorate the test Abraham passed in proving his love of God (Abraham is recognized as a prophet in Islam). By the time we arrived the sheep had been magically transformed into Mansef, the Jordanian national dish, consisting of chunks of mutton served over a bed of rice and sprinkled liberally with toasted almonds. Goat milk is used to make a quasi-yogurt sauce which is used like gravy. The entire dish is covered not with aluminum foil, but with a large covering made from a type of bread rolled out so flat and thin it is almost transparent. After some socializing with Arabic coffee, but before sitting down to a wonderful feast, Terry was whisked away to the kitchen where the women presented her with an extravagant gift of hand embroidered items. She told me later she was shown how the meal was prepared. Slowly the different families comprising the extended family entered. Everyone was in a festive mood. I was seated with the men of the extended family and we talked about Jordan and the region. The feast was, well, amazing. One culturally noteworthy incident during the meal was when I was asked whether I needed more food. I indicated I was full, but would accept a very small additional portion (I didn't want to be rude and refusing food is considered rude), one of the men immediately stood up and put 3 heaping serving spoons of rice on my plate and then topped it off with a huge chunk of mutton. The food was delicious. After the meal we retired to a sitting room where Arabic coffee (cardamom and cloves)and small cakes filled with pistachios and figs (made by the women of the family) were served. The extended family was all there including a passel of little children of all ages who really livened up the party. Terry kept the conversation moving through a discussion of Arabic words and customs. Another culturally noteworthy moment was when I whispered to Terry to switch hands because she was drinking her tea with her right hand and eating the little cakes with her left, a big no-no here. Terry's efforts generated much respect, a few laughs at her Arabic pronunciation, and great goodwill. She is a wonderful ambassador for the United States.

The Hajj is observed as part of this holiday in Mecca, Saudi Arabia. All Muslims pay attention to news of the Hajj from Mecca, so the television was tuned to a Saudi channel. Unfortunately, there was a stampede killing over 700 (as of this writing), an incident that was somewhat sobering since the family's patriarch plans to go to Hajj (one of the 5 pillars of Islam) next year, as they say "Inshallah!" ("God willing!") Every Muslim who is capable of doing so is obligated to make a pilgrimage to Hajj once. Saudi Arabia, keeper of the sacred sites, sets national quotas each year to keep the numbers of pilgrims in check. The numbers are still in the millions. Jordan allocates slots with preference to the elderly. Our host will qualify for the Hajj next year and his wife and oldest son may accompany him as his helpers. After many more rounds of Arabic coffee, tea with nana (mint), and small cakes, we departed to hugs and kisses from the women (for Terry) and solemn handshakes from all of the men (for me). Our hosts were extremely welcoming and insisted we return soon. Inshallah!

Classical Music

Tonight we were invited by locals to a classical music concert sponsored by the American Academy of Jordan. it beats watching tv in Arabic, whose channels include stations from Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Oman, Libya, Bahrain, and other Gulf Region countries. Tonight's concert featured a violinist, a cellist, and a pianist; three young Korean-American women trained at Julliard. Each of the three wore a gown in a color of the American flag, red, white, or blue in keeping with the American theme for the evening. The concert was held at the Al Hussein Cultural Center in downtown Amman, a large dramatic building. The tickets cost 10 JD, a bargain at roughly $14 U.S. The concert hall was nearly filled with the local Korean community and Americans of every stripe, some overlapping, and many Jordanians. I had the urge to ask the Americans "what's your story?" as one does not just happen to be in Jordan; interesting roads lead here. The Jordanian National Anthem had us quickly and respectfully on our feet. An undentified man gave what seemed like a friendly speech in Arabic. It wasn't translated but he did ask at the end, in English, to turn mobile phones to vibrate, some things don't change. The musicians were very friendly and informal. Their comments were translated into Arabic for the audience. They were superb. After more than an hour their encore was as unexpected as the Jordanian National Anthem. They played Amazing Grace. It was at first surprising and disorienting to hear. This society is so overwhelmingly and visibly Islamic it's easy to forget there is a sizable minority Christian population. Though proselytizing is illegal, Christian churches can be found and the attitude toward them is one of tolerance. Of course Amazing Grace can be performed. It was just unexpected.

Upon returning home the evening was unusually cool so we decided to walk the half mile to nearby restaurants. The Arab cuisine is delicious, and I've become adept at ordering my favorites, including rice-filled grape leaves, but longing for a taste of home I ordered a hamburger with fries and a diet soda. Terry and I sat on an open balcony in the restaurant and enjoyed the cool night air. For cultural reasons, waiters, like taxi drivers, only address me, not my wife. Nargilas, or hookahs, water pipes full of sweet tobacco with as many flavors as Baskin Robbins ice cream, are smoked in restaurants but it still surprises me to see all the covered women puffing away. Similar to England, traffic control is accomplished through the use of round-abouts, or traffic circles, so often there are no lights to wait for when crossing the street to go home, so we have to be bold. Returning home we usually pass the U.S. Embassy, down the street from the Kuwaiti Embassy, with the Libyan Embassy on the nearby traffic circle. Around the corner from our apartment is the residence of the Ambassador of the Sultanate of Oman, whose huge home looks like a palace straight from the Arabian Nights. In the driveway of a similar palace-like house across the street is a Lamborghini, its poor cousin, a Maserati, relegated to being parked on the street - We're sure it's because we're new in the 'hood that they haven't offered us a lift.

Mt. Nebo

To cap our busy day we ascended switchbacks through desert mountains keeping the Dead Sea in view far below. Along the way we were stopped cold by a herd of goats ambling along the road. Three Bedouin herdsman soon came along to clear the way for us. This was after Terry jumped out of our cab, running after the herd taking pictures. Two Bedouin were on donkeys and the third on foot giving orders to his herding dog. We got a close look at how any goat that got out of line was quickly retrieved by the dog. As a cultural note this was only the second dog we've seen in Jordan. The other was dead in the road on the way to Jerash. Islam does not favor dogs as they are considered unclean. We do see many feral cats. While on the subject of animals, our driver screeched to a halt because on the hill just above us grazed a huge white camel, its Bedouin owner nowhere to be seen. Camel milk is considered particularly nutritious and can be bought in our supermarket. Outside of the city of Madaba, Jordan, known for its ancient mosaics and majority Christian population, we reached our next destination, Mt. Nebo. This mountain has been famed since biblical times as the place where Moses died after looking out over the Promised Land (Deuteronomy 34:1). Mt. Nebo is a narrow mountain with an abrupt drop off that, as you would expect, commands an amazing view past the Jordan River and Dead Sea to West Bank cities, Jerusalem, and beyond. At the summit is a Franciscan Roman Catholic church and small museum telling the story of Moses and displaying the mosaics for which the area is also famous. As at the baptismal site the experience of standing in these places from the Bible is very moving. All my life I heard of these places and now I see them in person. We stopped at an interpretive museum (dioramas) before heading home after a long and emotional day.

Floating in the Dead Sea

Let's be clear about one thing. Floating in the Dead Sea is a very strange experience. Everything you think you know about moving and surviving in the water is turned on its head. But I get ahead of myself. After we finished at the baptismal site we arrived at the Dead Sea and marveled at the view. There are many luxury hotels along the main road perched on the hillsides overlooking the water. We decided against booking a room in one because we are only an hour from Amman. One thing that surprised me is that both sides of the Dead Sea are mountainous, much like Lake Tahoe in California only with desert coloration. It's the lowest place on earth, quite a claim to fame. Because of the elevation, and the salt content of the water, the air has a kind of haze. Supposedly this filters out the UV rays from the sun making it a safer place to sunbathe; a claim I will not test. Since we were day trippers we sought out the nicest of the day spas, a resort called Oh Beach. It has all the amenities of a resort hotel minus the rooms. Upon entry we walked down many flights of stairs past the restaurants and infinity pools to the main attraction - The Dead Sea. It was exceedingly clear with a rocky bottom that quickly dropped off in depth. To enter we used the pontoon pier like everyone else. The bottom mud is renowned for its ability to beautify anyone. Many people at the pontoon pier side were smeared head to toe with this pitch black mud. Having no need for such beautification myself, I proceeded carefully over the side with Terry hovering, IPad at the ready, to record whatever might happen for posterity (posterity being our grand daughter, who in a few years will be ready for a few cheap laughs at Grandpa's expense). Remember at the beginning I said it was a strange experience? Well here's why. Whereas sea water is roughly three per cent salt, the Dead Sea is thirty per cent salt, ten times greater. The water is thick like syrup. You can't swim, you can only float. The water forces you to float. Floating is effortless. It's moving around that is difficult. My legs just would not help me move. After being duly recorded by my (chuckling) wife, I was ready to get out. I struggled to get turned around so that I could use my arms to swim (really float) backward to the pier. At times I wondered what would happen if in my struggle to move I flipped over on my face. A side note, any cuts, abrasions or openings to the skin really talk to you while in the water. Thrashing about that results in water in the eyes is a very bad idea. Maybe if I wanted to spend more time in the water I would have learned how to manuever around. It was a once in a lifetime experience in a beautiful setting - and it gave me something cool to write about.

Bethany Beyond the Jordan

For a Christian the most meaningful biblical site in Jordan is Bethany Beyond the Jordan, the authenticated Jordan River site where Jesus Christ was baptised (John 1:28) by John the Baptist. Given its religious significance to Christians, churches were built near the site, monks lived in caves nearby, and pilgrims visited. This tradition continued until the 14th Century when the power of the Crusaders vanished. East of the Jordan River was no longer a safe place to go and the site was lost over the centuries. In 1897 a scholar from Jerusalem found a mosaic map of the site in Madaba, Jordan, and interest was renewed. However, for most of the 20th Century the area was off limits due to war. The 1994 peace treaty between Jordan and Israel changed everything. The area, which had been a militarized zone, was cleared of land mines and archaeological exploration began in earnest. In the short time since 1994 remains of five churches, a large monastery, a vast water system, and three pools dating from the Roman period were found. The website baptismsite.com provides more information for those interested. Historians and archeologists confirmed this is the baptismal site with such certainty that all three (Roman Catholic) Popes visited in the past 15 years. Because of its significance to Christians, many new churches were built within a short walk of the site including Coptic, Armenian, Ethiopian, Syrian Orthodox, Roman Catholic, Greek Orthodox, Anglican, Russian Orthodox, Lutheran, and Baptist denominations. The site is a little less than an hour from Amman going downhill through beautiful desert mountains. It is roughly 300 ft below sea level so this time of year one plans for heat. We bought tickets for a shuttle bus to drive us 15 minutes into the military zone because the Jordan River is the border. On the ride the West Bank city of Jericho was visible. After the bus stopped we had an escorted ten minute walk to the baptismal site. It is not in the Jordan River itself but in a side pool. This would have been a more manageable site for baptisms since the Jordan was then subject to severe flooding. Remains of a church are next to the pool with ancient floor mosaics about all that is left. It is quite a moment for any Christian to be there and consider the significance of the baptism to individual faith for nearly 2000 years, and to world history. From there we walked to a new Greek Orthodox church built on the riverbank and toured it. A short walk down some steps to the river revealed an amazing sight. The River Jordan here is only about twenty feet wide, if that. Jordan and Israel both have stairs leading down to the river. Soldiers from Jordan and Israel stand on their respective sides less than about 20 feet from each other as literally hundreds of people on both sides make their way to the water, wave at each other across the border, and wade into the Jordan where Jesus once stood. Visitors can and did talk, laugh, and take pictures of each other and the scene across this international border, the lone soldier on each side guarding against anyone who might try a foolhardy crossing. If not for the soldiers crossing would be effortless since the yellowish-brown water is calm. On the Jordanian side a large stone urn contains river water and many visitors baptized themselves Catholic style on the forehead before leaving, as did I. This will be one of my life's most memorable experiences.

Visas and Groceries

Today we renewed our visas. So off we went with our Fulbright minder to the appointment at the police station. The bureaucratic low point (but actually funniest moment of the day) is when we were questioned about our apartment and didn't know the name of our street. The police officer, a woman covered head to toe, questioned us as to landmarks and nearby streets since we still don't know the name of our street (although we did finally find out our apartment number). We were fingerprinted then taken to the women's restroom to wash the ink off of our fingers. We were left to wait in a small room for our new visas. The problem was the heat since the building was not air conditioned and Terry, who is usually pretty good with heat, nearly fainted. Keep in mind that for cultural reasons we both wear long sleeved shirts and long pants. We are eager for cooler weather as everything from touring to shopping to just getting around our neighborhood is affected by the intense (frequently over 100 degrees) heat.

After getting our new visas we were off to shop at a large supermarket, a French chain, some distance from our apartment. Large grocery stores in Amman are located in the basements of large malls. The malls here are huge and very modern. We had our driver wait for us. We aren't really set up in the apartment for serious cooking, especially since the oven is in centigrade and we have yet to figure out some appliances. Many of the convenience products we're used to at home aren't available here, which is not an issue since we are enjoying trying the very unusual and tasty local foods, but we needed to get many grocery bags full of water and soft drinks up through the mall and into the taxi. Getting to the taxi afterward up two floors in the mall, then to curbside with our full shopping cart, then loading the groceries into the taxi, then up the elevator at the apartment, was an adventure, like the foods we bought. We bought fuzzy basil seeds suspended in an apricot drink, salad with rice wrapped in grape leaves, small cakes filled with everything from dates to orange jelly, and salads made of ingredients we are still trying to identify. We also bought nuts. Every grocery store has a kiosk inside with many varieties of fresh roasted nuts. Likewise, spices are sold from large bins and put into small plastic bags. When you buy produce you wait in line for a produce person to weigh the produce and put it in a plastic bag before you continue with your shopping.

Terry, who is becoming active in the Jordanian Nursing Council and Sigma Theta Tau, the honors society for nurses in which she holds membership, just found out Fulbright ordered business cards for her but I've had my quota of taxi rides for today. I will add I am getting braver on campus, meanwhile, and instead of sitting in Terry's office when she attends faculty meetings and luncheons, I have been walking around outside the enormous campus, getting coffee at MacDonalds (no kidding - a little guilty pleasure from home) and enjoying our adventures here in Jordan.

Expat Life

For years I wondered what expat life would be like. We got a small taste in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, a few years ago but for me this is a first. We've been here about a month and what follows are superficial background descriptions of some of the interesting people we've encountered:

1) An Austrian who moved to Amman to open a bakery. 2) An Uzbekistani Jordanian with a dog grooming business. 3) A Canadian Jordanian software engineer. 4) A Bangladeshi American studying the Holy Koran. 5) A black Kuwaiti gym manager. 6) A French American born in Morocco and raised in Korea. 7) A Cuban American literature instructor. 8) A prosperous Palestinian family expelled from Kuwait after the Gulf War. 9) An American woman raised by expat parents in Mexico. 10) A knighted Jordanian medical doctor who turned to full time social activism. 11) American diplomats with amazing and varied backgrounds. 12) A British nurse, a convert to Islam, who became Jordanian, raised a family here, and is now a grandmother. 13) A European-American couple, both physicians, who retired to Amman to be near their daughter and her family. 14) A Jordanian commodities trader living in London but visiting home. 15) An American lawyer working for an NGO, shuttling between Amman and Rabat, Morocco.

All of the above people are impressive. All have fascinating stories to tell about their careers, families, and the journeys that brought them to Amman. To say we are enthralled would be an understatement. And this is before Terry really gets started teaching at the University of Jordan with all the possibilities that entails. I'm sure the fact that Amman is the national capital plays a role in this variety if for no other reason than the presence of embassies. Jordan, a crossroads in this region, is as I described in an earlier post, the "eye of the hurricane."

We have much to learn about expat life. Of course living in the expat enclave of Abdoun softens what could otherwise be overwhelming culture shock. Our recent trip to downtown underscored that reality. What is really nice is that Jordanians are extremely hospitable and probably overlook our cultural shortcomings by the bushel. The expats we've met go out of their way to be helpful. When Terry isn't working we both attend and host gatherings almost daily. There's something about shared experience that creates an immediate bond.

Taxis and Traffic

By far the biggest challenge we face is transportation, particularly since we are used to having a car at home with all the freedom and convenience that brings. Amman is a huge city with dense traffic. Don't think of it as some small town where everything needed is close at hand. We either walk in a city where public walking is not the cultural norm, or we have a driver on stand-by for the smallest of errands. Also, we chose to live in an expat friendly suburb where the tradeoff for Western style amenities is greater distance to those amenities, something we didn't fully appreciate from afar. Being a pedestrian here also requires extreme attention to traffic since the norms we are used to at home don't apply. We are often a spectacle walking along very carefully, often on the shoulder of the road, with every passing taxi honking to signal availability - and those that don't honk probably wondering why the heck we are out walking in 100 degree heat to begin with, a question I sometimes ask myself (of late we do most of our walking at night on a safe back route to the Taj Mall area). Getting into those taxis is quite an experience given my tall frame. As a cultural note, women always sit in the back seat so Terry sits in back and I sit in the front with the driver. Also, I'm guessing most of you do not know that Jordan is a cash society. That means everything from rent to groceries to cab rides are paid for by cash. The practice here is to tip by rounding up so a taxi ride - or restaurant bill - of (for example) 2.5 JD (Jordanian Dinar) would be rounded up to 3 JD and would be the amount paid. There is no additional tipping, in cabs or restaurants, though we sometimes give more.

Sandstorm

We woke up to find that the beautiful view of East Amman from our terrace had completely disappeared. A few times each year a sandstorm blows in from Saudi Arabia and plays havoc here. This one made international news and is causing problems all over the Middle East. There have even been deaths in Lebanon from the storm. Our terrace is covered in a fine layer of sand and it's difficult to keep it out of the apartment. When we did venture out it was an other worldly experience peering through the brown haze. Soon we retreated inside after learning about health warnings and that all Ammani school children were issued masks today. The storm is due to last another two days so we will play a lot of Scrabble until then. Our plans to visit Petra will have to wait.

Dinner in a Jordanian Home

Before arriving in Jordan we read that a highlight is dinner in a local home. Our guidebook "The Rough Guide to Jordan" goes on at length about what to expect and how to behave on such occasions. We thought this would be for later on once we had been here for a while. Were we ever wrong! Terry was asked by a local to help him with his doctoral dissertation. Typically Terry, she agreed to help without hesitating. He asked us if we would be willing to come to his house to work on it. Again, typical of my wife, she agreed without hesitation and before meeting him in person. He picked us up and drove us some distance to a suburb where his extended family was waiting with an elaborate Arab meal. We met his parents, wife, and children. There were apologies because uncles, aunts, and cousins couldn't make it. The family hails originally from Hebron and Jerusalem. For years they lived and worked in Kuwait before being expelled following the First Gulf War because they were foreign born. Their home was beautiful with ornate furniture. After Terry provided dissertation suggestions dinner was served. It was huge. It was a real feast of rice with a colorful covering of meat and vegetables and delicious roasted almonds, a host of unique salads we have not yet identified, stuffed grape leaves, grilled chicken, stuffed pickles, yogurt dressings, juices and flatbread. The helpings kept coming. And coming. And coming. A cultural note here is that many of you know I am left handed. Eating with one's left hand isn't done here as it is considered unclean. So tonight was the first meal of my life eaten with my right hand (I don't recommend it). After dinner we retired again to the living room with Arabic coffee which contained cardamom and other unknown spices. Delicious. Then the fruit course followed. More coffee and tea. Then a chili-infused jello was served. More coffee and tea. We experienced sincere hospitality like no other. Another cultural note is that several times during the evening people excused themselves one by one to go pray. The parents and wife and children of our host were all present and equally welcoming. Three of the four children were presented including a four year old boy full of himself, a sweet seven year old girl, and a ninth grade boy who proudly showed off his very good English skills to his family by speaking with us. To top it off, they presented Terry with a beautiful gift of Dead Sea products and when it was time to go Terry was passed amongst the women so they could hug and kiss her. Jordan continues to amaze.

U.S. Embassy

I've said before I have a very impressive wife. Today she was a guest of a high ranking U.S. Embassy official and, in my role as hanger-on in chief, I was lucky enough to be allowed to go with her. The purpose was to introduce her around and discuss her participation in the American Speaker's Program sponsored by the Embassy and hosted all over the country. I'm happy to say my wife wrangled an invitation for me also because this experience, in a U.S. Embassy, ranks up there with my favorite travel experiences - ever. Just being processed through all the levels of security was extremely interesting. Foremost was passing the manned armored personnel carrier complete with machine guns at the main entrance. We had to produce our passports several times at each checkpoint. We went through the now ubiquitous metal detector, we were searched, they removed and kept my cell phone while we were inside, they kept our passports, and we had to wear loud red badges that said we must be under escort at all times while in the Embassy. We were escorted in by a staff member who guided us through what seemed like a labyrinth, then we were greeted by our host. He gave us a brief tour, answered questions, and explained many things about life in an Embassy. There are hundreds of Americans stationed there and many Jordanians employed. The Ambassador lives in the Embassy, which is not often the case. Then we were off to lunch at the restaurant inside. Later we were joined by the official who heads the Speaker's Program. They were very impressed with Terry (did I say my wife is impressive?) and asked her to be one of their keynote speakers around the country. They will provide a driver and escort to each speaking engagement and, to my good fortune, agreed to Terry's request that I accompany her. The purpose of this program is a people to people exchange so Jordanians can interact with Americans, hopefully to mutual benefit. Terry will be a great voice in the program with her energy and goodwill. A cultural note: for the second time since we arrived we stopped in our tracks to avoid walking in front of a man kneeling in prayer. The reason we stopped, and did not cross in front of the man praying, is because when Muslims pray they touch their heads to the ground. It would be a gross breach of etiquette to walk in front of a person in prayer and thus give the impression the man was bowing to us. In this case it was a Jordanian soldier beside one of the personnel carriers. After kneeling several times and touching his forehead to the ground he finished, folded his prayer rug, and returned to duty. When we eventually resumed our walk he made it clear he appreciated our cultural sensitivity. We are on constant alert not to give offense here, the least we can do as guests of Jordan.

Dinner Party

Tonight we hosted our first dinner party in Jordan, attended by diplomats and locals. We used Meat Masters, a local institution, as caterers and even ordering from the caterer was a cultural experience. We called them and gave them the number of people attending, and the type of meat we wanted, and they decided which sides would complement the meal and delivered it to our door right before the party. Brisket was the main course and it lived up to its promise. Of cultural note, Jordanians don't always use street addresses, so directions are given by landmarks, a concept easier said than done in a foreign language. In fact, when we went to sign the lease for our apartment there was a lot of confusion because no one could locate the street name or number of the apartment - neither of which are posted outside or used by anyone. Because we live near the U.S. Embassy, I told the caterer to meet me by the only traffic light in front of the embassy and that he would recognize me because I am a tall American and will be wearing a funny looking hat (my anti-skin cancer armor). Sounds easy, right? Wrong. Many times I have resorted to walking out to said intersection in my silly looking sun hat that screams "I'm an American", cell phone pressed to my ear trying to hear over the din of traffic, trying to communicate in my best pidgin Arabic that the driver should look for the silly hat. I was finally found by the caterer and dinner was rescued. I'm sure I was quite the spectacle. But I digress. The food was a big hit and the conversation easily flowed. Because we are in a rental Terry cobbled together things like a salad bowl from the top of a cake container. Because Jordan is famous for its pastries, I had been dispatched earlier to procure a batch. I also went to buy soft drinks but because I am unfamiliar with the brands and types I picked out a wide selection and the party guests were good natured about trying things such as lemon and lime drink and explaining what other drinks were to us. We learned a new term common to the diplomatic world "third culture" meaning people who are American by birth but raised elsewhere and thus lack the cultural touch stones other Americans have. We also learned that Jordanians, like the people of New Orleans we befriended when living there, sit and eat a good meal and talk about what they plan to eat at the next meal. The excitement of new friends, new places, and tips to share about everything lasted for hours. The dinner was such a nice time for us I'm sure we'll do it again soon.

University of Jordan

My wife met with her new colleagues at the University of Jordan which is really big, modern, and covered with trees; a rarity here and a treat for the eyes. As we stepped from the car, by chance, two men were at curbside. They took one look at us and said, "Dr. Terry?" This was just the beginning of an extremely friendly welcome. They took us to meet the Dean then afterward whisked Terry away to meet everyone while I waited in Terry's new office, the Dean's former office, which was very large, with a table and chairs for conferences, comfortable padded chairs for visitors that I thoroughly enjoyed, and a well stocked library. The Dean also left Terry coffee and tea and other amenities. Afterward Terry returned and sat at her desk to get her bearings. As we sat in her office talking there was a steady stream of faculty stopping by to introduce themselves, offer to help in any way, and invite both of us to dinner or lunch at their homes. One was an invitation for mansef, the Jordanian national dish of rice, yogurt, and lamb. We can't wait. Terry is already editing manuscripts, scheduled for guest lectures, and preparing to teach her doctoral students. We are returning to the campus tomorrow so she can attend a Jordanian Nursing Council conference. Of note culturally is that when a male faculty member wanted to signal Terry he does not shake hands with women, he entered her office with his right hand over his heart, indicating sincerity of intent. Also of cultural note is that when we told the other professors we have only one child, they seemed confused and asked what the reason was behind not having more children. The cultural note I will end on is when Terry used Arabic words, sentences, or phrases, the faculty warmed right up to her and reactions varied from smiles to hugs and kisses. My wife is impressive on many levels.

Trip to Jerash and Ajlun Castle

As I wrote in a previous entry, the Islamic holiday Eid postponed classes. In the interim we are speeding up some of our touring in country. Yesterday we went first to Jerash, a city about an hour north of Amman, and passed rolling hills filled with olive trees. We also passed the Baqa'a refugee camp for Palestinians who fled to Jordan during the 1967 war. It is the largest refugee camp for Palestinians in Jordan still housing over 100,000 people. The original tents have long since given way to concrete structures but it is still a labyrinth of narrow alleyways. Our driver told us that many refugees became productive citizens, here and abroad, and interiors of homes can be quite elaborate.

Jerash is a small city with extensive Roman ruins which include standing buildings, a hippodrome (racetrack for chariots), places of worship and long streets lined with what used to be shops. Frankly, the ruins seemed to me more extensive than the area around the Forum in Rome. It's striking to walk among them and think about all those who passed through over the centuries. Unlike museums elsewhere, you can walk right up and touch the walls, the mosaics, the delicate patterns carved into stone. It took us about an hour to walk through before yielding to the heat. Just like at Wild Jordan the visitor's center has a plaque saying it is a gift from the people of the United States through USAID. As a tourist destination Jordan has always been relatively undiscovered, even more so with all the turmoil in the region. Many are unaware that Jordan is safe, relatively crime-free, many people speak English, are friendly, and appreciate showing visitors around.

An hour away from Jerash is Ajlun Castle, perched high on a very tall hill. It is awe-inspiring to drive by on the highway, look way up, and see a magnificent castle built by Saladin in the seventh century A.D. to defend the area from the Crusaders. It is not for those afraid of heights. While touring the castle we came upon a group of colorfully clad Bangladeshi schoolgirls. When my wife rose to avoid ruining their photographs they loudly demanded of her (smiling all the while), "SIT! SIT!" then proceeded to throw their arms around her in an embrace and posed for photos.

Everything we experienced was equal parts welcoming and friendly, fascinating and fun. And hot. On our way back I asked the driver to drop us off at the renowned Blue Fig restaurant because I thought my poor wife was going to faint. The restaurants, again, are equal parts exotic and Western. Yes, they had pizza, but it was like nothing you have ever seen. Yes, they had salads, but they included local produce and balls of labneh, yogurt infused with mint and thyme and rolled in a patina of fresh crushed nuts.

Courtship Rituals

Today we hired a new taxi driver for our Amman tour, one recommended by a former Fulbrighter. An English speaking taxi driver is like gold to us since we've discovered transportation in this huge city is our biggest challenge. We were pleased to find that his English is excellent. After a few hours of pleasant conversation he mentioned his wife. Since Terry was along, and he brought up the subject, she could ask a few questions. It would be highly improper for me to inquire about his wife under any circumstances, even to learn if he has one.

Our driver was very willing to answer Terry's questions and soon we had a description of Jordanian courtship rituals. Like most other things we have found here there is the traditional and the modern. First, the modern. It's much like anywhere else so that's all I'll say about it.

Our driver is traditional so he told his Mother he would like to marry. He gave her his wish list for a wife and his Mother set out on a broad search for someone suitable. She asked friends, friends of friends, and relatives if they knew any good candidates. She then went to meet roughly 25 women for interviews. Since there were only women present she could see them uncovered and could report back to our driver such things as curly vs. straight hair and other physical attributes. Once she found the best match in her eyes a chaperoned meeting between her son and the young woman was arranged. They hit it off so our driver asked her parents first if he could propose. They said yes so he proposed. She gave it some thought and said yes. Then a small engagement party was held. At that time a legal marriage contract was entered. Following that they were allowed to see each other along lines we know in the West. However, being conservative Moslims they were allowed no more than kisses on the cheek during this time. At any time either could call it off. If called off, the dissolution would stipulate that she remained a virgin during the contract so that she would not be forever damaged and could find another husband. After nine months they had a larger wedding ceremony. He is 34 and she is 22. She covers her head (but not her face) and wears a full length long sleeved dress with arms covered for modesty's sake. They have been married two years and are hoping for children soon.

The Citadel

Today we decided to tour the city. This took us out of our West Amman comfort zone (though we had a driver so we weren't too adventurous). First stop was The Citadel and the Pillars of Hercules atop a Jabal or hill(Amman is built on a series of hills just like Rome). The Roman portion was commissioned by Emperor Marcus Aurelius in a city then known as Philadelphia. I urge readers to google this site as I have not yet mastered uploading photos on blogspot. It was very dramatic with antiquities dating back to 1950 B.C. The Roman columns forming the Pillars of Hercules are visible for miles around the Old City. There are ruins of a Byzantine church there dating from the 600s A.D. A small museum of antiquities is also there. Next stop was the Roman Amphitheater which is remarkably well preserved. We saw it in then moved on to Habibah, the most famous kenefeh shop in Amman. Terry previously described this dessert which is highly unusual and delicious. It proved the axiom "life is short, eat dessert first" because then we headed to.... Wild Jordan is a cafe perched precariously on a hillside with stunning views of Amman and the Citadel. It is modern (unusual for this part of town) and affiliated with a nature conservancy. It has a gift shop of high end Jordanian crafts and another great thing, a highly efficient air conditioner which by this point we direly needed. Of note was a plaque saying Wild Jordan is a gift from the people of the United States, which generated table talk about the pros and cons of foreign aid. Our lunch was excellent and a needed break. Following Wild Jordan we toured by car several neighborhoods, the most notable of which was that of the Royal Palace. It is not visible from the road but some of the grounds were. The many large villas neighboring the Royal Palace were spectacular.

Eye of the Hurricane

This week we were briefed at the Fulbright House about what to expect in Jordan. One of the speakers was the Regional Security Officer (RSO) from the U.S. Embassy. He summed up Jordan succinctly as the "eye of the hurricane." A glance at a map will show you why. The Syrian civil war has sent over 700,000 refugees fleeing into Jordan (over 83,000 in a tent city on the border that has few jobs but most essentials of a city as it has become in only two years, complete with ATMs) . Iraq remains in turmoil. The Israeli/Palestinian conflict seems never ending. Saudi Arabia is in conflict with Yemen. Daesh (the Jordanian term of contempt for ISIS) continues to run amok.

The stability of Jordan is of extreme importance to the West and the region. The United States has upped it's yearly support to $1.3 billion. The U.N. High Commissioner for Refugees has a huge presence here. Many non governmental organizations (NGOs) have large operations here providing refugees everything from food to blankets to legal support to yoga lessons. This results in a surprising number of Westerners who have come here to help and have stayed on, many for years.

Amman is the center of it all. It's population has swelled enormously in just the past two years and more than half the country's population lives here. Most Syrian refugees are now city dwellers who have either bypassed the border camps altogether or came here from them. The city is an incredible amalgam of nationalities. Previous waves of refugees actually form the majority of the population. Palestinians make up between 60% and 70% and they are well integrated into society. Even Queen Rania is Palestinian.

What is a Fulbright?

I realized you may not be familiar with Fulbrights. Senator Fulbright's exchange program, signed into law by President Truman in 1946, is to "turn nations into people" by strengthening ties between countries through education. 

The fierce competition to win a Fulbright lasts an entire year. Similar to the Olympics, where one competes in areas like swimming or running, Fulbrighters compete in specific areas. Students with college degrees and foreign language fluency compete to teach English. Others compete to do research for doctoral degrees. The category called "Fulbright Scholar" (my wife) is for those who have a terminal degree (usually a doctorate) and they have a choice whether to teach in university, research, or both. 

The goal of the Fulbright is to strengthen cultural and educational ties with other countries and my wife, being who she is, already volunteered for several additional projects. Because of the holidays, we will tour for a few weeks until university classes begin. As we travel and familiarize ourselves with the country Terry will edit work for Jordanians who asked her for assistance with their articles and dissertations.

There are many resources available if you are interested in more details about the Fulbright.